How Not to Hire a Soccer Coach, Ft. the United States Soccer Federation

Thanks to all of you who respected my privacy in these dark times. Just know this: the Power Cube remains eternal.

Anyway, back when the US hired Gregg Berhalter for a second time they released a ridiculous document outlining the process and big-upping their use of data, psychological tests, and rigorous criteria to land on the guy who was already the guy. I wrote about everything that was wrong with that document — and how you might fix it:

These complex interactions are so hard to identify and even harder to measure. Anyone who tells you they know how to do it is lying. And that brings us to the worst part of U.S. Soccer's dossier on the process that brought them to bringing back Berhalter -- a section that explains how Crocker landed on his final choice:

"Within these categories, he utilized advanced data analytics, sophisticated metrics, and cutting-edge hiring methods to profile and rank each candidate. During the course of several weeks, candidates were evaluated through all of these filters and went through a battery of practical and psychological testing. In the end, after a multitude of domestic and international coaches were considered, the choice, in the end, was clear and convincing."

Despite what Crocker & Co. say, there are no great metrics to predict future managerial performance. Because of that, you actually can't land on a "clear and convincing" option -- unless somehow Klopp or Pep become an option. It's all, of course, even more absurd when you realize that this clear and convincing option was the guy who was already the coach, the guy they would then fire a year later.

Also, I was on Slate’s fantastic Hang Up and Listen pod to talk about the Copa America debacle and the end of the summer of men’s senior-international soccer. Happy Wednesday, all.