On this week’s podcast, we’re selecting a starting XI and a manager who best represent the ethos of No Grass in the Clouds and its differently-named podcast. Who should we pick? If you want your nomination(s) to be considered, please drop them in the thread below!
If Grealish doesn't get the arm band it's a travesty, Full lineup: Potter as manager TAA Van Djik Mings Lamptey Grealish Son Salah Milner Bamford Vardy( if you keep him out, he will earn a penalty and taunt your fans at home) with Mendy as the anti-Kepa in goal, Gunnersauras as mascot and Lee Cattermole as spokesperson.
Roy Hodgson - but at Center Forward, not Manager. Jamie Carragher and Gary Neville will co-manage but will be mic'd up and connected by a 10-foot chain wherever they go just like those NFL Ref commercials.
Give me Marco Rose or Ralph Hassenhutl for gaffer + Marcus Thuram, Myron Boadu, and like half of PSV Eindhoven with the last spot in the team going to Bartlomiej Dragowski with his #69 between the sticks
Kepa, TAA, Sergio Ramos, Van Dijk, Alphonso Davies, Thomas Grønnemark, Paredes, Messi, Jack Grealish's calves and insouciance, Gunnersaurus, Lewa, any man bun from Leeds, and Neymar's dives.
Coached by Sean Dyche when he's not supervising second shift down in the coal mine.
Federico Chiesa, who Ryan at one point last season said had the worst xG per shot of any player in Europe's top five leagues (of players who took over a certain number of shots). His shot maps on Understat are like the Sistine Chapel x1000. I hope Juve doesn't kill his light.
But assuming he's not still king of bad shots, I hope whoever took his crown can find a spot in the XI. That spot being well outside the box and at a terrible angle to goal.
manager is pep. Pep is where all of *this* starts. there is before pep and after pep. (and before pep is pre big bang so the universe is dark matter and not actual managers)
The correct answer is a mix of players, staff, and analytics department from Liverpool, Midtjylland, Leipzig, Salzburg, Brentford, and Atalanta. The list of players who succeeded despite Ryan's doubts are Kane, Vardy, Grealish, Joao Felix (He's a Chris Paul member of the two name club), Perisic, Mkhitaryan, Mina, Matty Cash, Felipe, and Trippier with Navas in goal. So isn't that the Infinite Football All Stars because they went beyond what you thought possible for them?
Klopp for Manager because why would you pick anybody else?... and Liverpool have the best analytics department in football and this newsletter/podcast might as well be called xG. Team: GK: Tim Howard - Man is still analyzing teams post retirement so it fits the bill. Defense: RB/LB: TAA and Robertson - newish design of attack from them is cutting edge strategy, CBs: Cannavaro and Chiellini - effective as hell but a little prickish, Midfield: Pirlo, Pogba, Zidane - SWAG though. Attack: Suarez, Messi, Zlatan, Ronaldo - not sure how they would work together but I’m not sure how y’all do, Mascot: Gunnersauras - y’all won’t shut up about him soooooo
If we're going all leagues it's still Potter, TAA, Van Djik, Grealish, Salah, Bamford and Vardy (because if you count him out, he's getting his hattrick) but they're joined by Ramos (to complement Salah), Zlatan bc he's Zlatan, Messi, Alphonso Davies, and Oblak in goal. Ronaldo can be PR Representative who works with Davies to promote brand name, Dean Smith becomes assistant manager and Arteta takes notes at his side. Arsenal's finishing 10th but at least Gunnersaurus can be team mascot.
Love all these. We have recorded the pod. You will be equal parts disappointed, enraged, baffled, amazed, and exhausted by our choices. Love you all.
I mean, Adama Traoré is the first name on the teamsheet, right?
Bielsa for gaffer
Is it really a team if it doesn't have David Luiz playing CDM?
If Grealish doesn't get the arm band it's a travesty, Full lineup: Potter as manager TAA Van Djik Mings Lamptey Grealish Son Salah Milner Bamford Vardy( if you keep him out, he will earn a penalty and taunt your fans at home) with Mendy as the anti-Kepa in goal, Gunnersauras as mascot and Lee Cattermole as spokesperson.
Zlatan in the streets, Bamford in the (stat)sheets
Roy Hodgson - but at Center Forward, not Manager. Jamie Carragher and Gary Neville will co-manage but will be mic'd up and connected by a 10-foot chain wherever they go just like those NFL Ref commercials.
Shelvey off the bench at a minimum. Those packing stats can’t be denied.
Give me Marco Rose or Ralph Hassenhutl for gaffer + Marcus Thuram, Myron Boadu, and like half of PSV Eindhoven with the last spot in the team going to Bartlomiej Dragowski with his #69 between the sticks
We know you love xG so consider The Golden xG boot winner of 19-20 (source:understand) Gabriel Jesus
Mark Noble, lining up wherever he wants
Need at least one forward from Atalanta
We shall not forget the great Frankie de Jong
Kepa, TAA, Sergio Ramos, Van Dijk, Alphonso Davies, Thomas Grønnemark, Paredes, Messi, Jack Grealish's calves and insouciance, Gunnersaurus, Lewa, any man bun from Leeds, and Neymar's dives.
Coached by Sean Dyche when he's not supervising second shift down in the coal mine.
Quaresma. For the whimsy.
Lucian Favre for manager because he always outperforms xG
Your boy Jack Grealish is a lock
Alessandro Diamanti, mainly for his 14 shot performance in a 0-0 draw back in the day, needless to say all from range
Federico Chiesa, who Ryan at one point last season said had the worst xG per shot of any player in Europe's top five leagues (of players who took over a certain number of shots). His shot maps on Understat are like the Sistine Chapel x1000. I hope Juve doesn't kill his light.
But assuming he's not still king of bad shots, I hope whoever took his crown can find a spot in the XI. That spot being well outside the box and at a terrible angle to goal.
manager is pep. Pep is where all of *this* starts. there is before pep and after pep. (and before pep is pre big bang so the universe is dark matter and not actual managers)
Haven't seen any stats on this, but can't imagine there's a CB better at progressing the ball than Upamecano. He's gotta get some PT on this team
The correct answer is a mix of players, staff, and analytics department from Liverpool, Midtjylland, Leipzig, Salzburg, Brentford, and Atalanta. The list of players who succeeded despite Ryan's doubts are Kane, Vardy, Grealish, Joao Felix (He's a Chris Paul member of the two name club), Perisic, Mkhitaryan, Mina, Matty Cash, Felipe, and Trippier with Navas in goal. So isn't that the Infinite Football All Stars because they went beyond what you thought possible for them?
I mean, can I say Leon Goretzka? Does that get me banned?
Klopp for Manager because why would you pick anybody else?... and Liverpool have the best analytics department in football and this newsletter/podcast might as well be called xG. Team: GK: Tim Howard - Man is still analyzing teams post retirement so it fits the bill. Defense: RB/LB: TAA and Robertson - newish design of attack from them is cutting edge strategy, CBs: Cannavaro and Chiellini - effective as hell but a little prickish, Midfield: Pirlo, Pogba, Zidane - SWAG though. Attack: Suarez, Messi, Zlatan, Ronaldo - not sure how they would work together but I’m not sure how y’all do, Mascot: Gunnersauras - y’all won’t shut up about him soooooo
If we're going all leagues it's still Potter, TAA, Van Djik, Grealish, Salah, Bamford and Vardy (because if you count him out, he's getting his hattrick) but they're joined by Ramos (to complement Salah), Zlatan bc he's Zlatan, Messi, Alphonso Davies, and Oblak in goal. Ronaldo can be PR Representative who works with Davies to promote brand name, Dean Smith becomes assistant manager and Arteta takes notes at his side. Arsenal's finishing 10th but at least Gunnersaurus can be team mascot.
Yerry Mina starting CB
Best XI of USMNT players in Europe who rarely play for their teams
The God Higuita between (and beyond) the posts
(tip toes in) Luis Suarez (runs away)
Victor Malcorra - based on hair style alone
The “I Am Jack’s Calves All-Stars”
Gotta respect Fufi and have Yung Jack Grealish on the teamsheet