The Manchester Derby kicks off at 1230 pm EST. After stabilizing their defense, City once again look one of the best teams in the world. After collapsing in the Champions League, United once again look totally rudderless. And yet! It’s been 20 months since City last took a single point off of United. Let’s see what happens, and let’s do it together, here.
I realize I haven't commented in anything that's happened in the game since, I don't know, halftime. But, basically: United can only really create chances on the break, but City are playing two D-mids and two conservative fullbakcs, which is preventing United from breaking. Meanwhile, United defend deep reasonably well, and to break them down, you need as many bodies forward as possible to stretch them out, but since City are worried about the counter, they only have four players contributing to the attack. The result: this.
I'm starting to think that Aaron Wan-Bissaka isn't very good. His 1v1 defending is probably a little overrated -- see: Sterling putting him into the ground -- and United get killed by diagonal balls onto his zone of the field. Then, he doesn't offer much going forward. Might be better off in a different position, imo.
Possibly as a CB in a back-three or as a DM. His best skill is ball-winning, right? So deploy that in a part of the field where it might be more useful.
Graeme Le Saux just said "you can't take man-marking literally" and then basically said that you have to pick up the man when he's in your area but let him go when he's not. That is ... the opposite of man-marking.
So, uh, yeahhhhhhhh. City could've and should've won -- not sure what all the talk re: United being pleased with the performance is about -- but doesn't change the fact that we all just spend two hours of our lives beaming that shit into our brains. I'm not sure that Pep's gameplan was actually all the bad, either; it just looked like shit and theres gotta be a way to keep that kind of control while also adding in some width. An inverted fullback and winger on the same side is just ugly as hell. I'd really like to know what Pep ideally sees the attack looking like in his head. United -- I mean, sure? They played a game of soccer, and they didn't concede a goal. Their list of achievements ends there.
Metaphorical Cubed Ham Recipient: Harry Maguire. A couple nice blocks from Ol Slabhead, and he's a big reason why United kind of shut City down. It wasn't a performance worthy of Spanish ham, Christmas ham, or frankly most other kinds of ham. So, he's going home with a vaccum-sealed package of pre-cooked cubed ham. Congrats, Harry.
Sorry that was so bad. But thanks for joining in. As I've been saying a lot recently: you guys made that way more fun that it had any right to be. Enjoy your weekends, all.
That first-half felt exactly like what every Liverpol/Chelsea/United/Arsenal game felt like from 2005 to 2010. Cagey, fullbacks not involved high up the field, and the only chances come from set pieces or pretty fast, vertical combinations.
i feel that era was more rutting stags banging their heads together. these two at the moment are more (insert smaller antlerless mammal of your choice)
What changes do we think Pep makes out of half? (Assuming that he didn't just wrestle with the epistemological conundrums of "Man Marking" the entire time)
If anyone feels a need for entertainment after that, try to hunt down a clip of Pavard giving the world's least necessary bicycle kick a go at the end of Bayern v. Union
I feel like Chelsea/Everton SHOULD be more entertaining? but i've watched two EPL matches this morning and seen 1 late pk goal (The Bundesliga in between was way more fun) But the derby could be the right move
I just heard the commentator mention how the United away record is much better than home record. Does it even matter in this post apocalyptic football world? What's the difference between in a home and an away game? The difference in font size on those giant cards?
He's really good, though I think he's more of a floor-raiser than a ceiling-raiser. Give him the keys and he'll turn you into a pretty good team, but don't totally see him plugging into an elite team and making them better. But, uh, the announcers suggested earlier that he could make his teammates better by just talking to them.
Definitely more common in the stretches without ilkay. him not on the field maybe the reason since rodri is so deep and ferna doesn't close like he used to
it's kinda amazing how Fred just starts now and it's normal. Fred starting used to mean that the Rapture was imminent or at the very least the rest of the midfield were involved in an accident. Now OGS keeps him on even if the referee is minutes away from sending him off because Fred.
Games like this are why Mourinhoball could still win a title.
Jose is likely enjoying this game more than any game this season
though he likely wishes fred would play more like a bastard
he bought a batman and a GOT chair. the man's just loving life right now
I realize I haven't commented in anything that's happened in the game since, I don't know, halftime. But, basically: United can only really create chances on the break, but City are playing two D-mids and two conservative fullbakcs, which is preventing United from breaking. Meanwhile, United defend deep reasonably well, and to break them down, you need as many bodies forward as possible to stretch them out, but since City are worried about the counter, they only have four players contributing to the attack. The result: this.
John Stones starting over Aymeric Laporte in the Manchester Derby. Life comes at you fast!
The fact that there are only two minutes of ET tells you everything you need to know.
Surprised by the lack of gamesmanship. Pretty take for a derby. These are the matches where you really feel the lack of a crowd.
*tame
Definitely did not have "Manchester City get the first great chance of the match on a counter-attack" on my bingo card.
I'm starting to think that Aaron Wan-Bissaka isn't very good. His 1v1 defending is probably a little overrated -- see: Sterling putting him into the ground -- and United get killed by diagonal balls onto his zone of the field. Then, he doesn't offer much going forward. Might be better off in a different position, imo.
*into
He doesn't really offer enough offensively for a team that wants to be among the best in the world.
It does seem like his best work/highlight reel is all recovery tackles that inevitably include an announcer using the adverb “telescopically”.
What position do you think he might be better in?
Possibly as a CB in a back-three or as a DM. His best skill is ball-winning, right? So deploy that in a part of the field where it might be more useful.
Oooh really like the RCB idea. 1 v 1 D still important, doesn't need to push forward as much, can cover the ground an outside CB would need to.
Javier Mascherano vibes for sure as a DM / kinda sweeper
i think he could be better moving inside as an outside cb in a back 3 a la cesar azpilicueta for conte
Graeme Le Saux just said "you can't take man-marking literally" and then basically said that you have to pick up the man when he's in your area but let him go when he's not. That is ... the opposite of man-marking.
also the principles of jim boeheim's famous man to man defense as well
"You can't take man-marking literally. You have to just do zonal marking instead."
He also just interrupted Arlo mid-sentence just say "I think the teams are just feeling each other out a little bit here."
FT Stat Update:
Shots (on target): United 11 (2), City 9 (2)
xG: United 0.6, City 1.33
Attacking-third passes: United 41, City 104
Penalty-area passes: United 5, City 10
So, uh, yeahhhhhhhh. City could've and should've won -- not sure what all the talk re: United being pleased with the performance is about -- but doesn't change the fact that we all just spend two hours of our lives beaming that shit into our brains. I'm not sure that Pep's gameplan was actually all the bad, either; it just looked like shit and theres gotta be a way to keep that kind of control while also adding in some width. An inverted fullback and winger on the same side is just ugly as hell. I'd really like to know what Pep ideally sees the attack looking like in his head. United -- I mean, sure? They played a game of soccer, and they didn't concede a goal. Their list of achievements ends there.
Metaphorical Cubed Ham Recipient: Harry Maguire. A couple nice blocks from Ol Slabhead, and he's a big reason why United kind of shut City down. It wasn't a performance worthy of Spanish ham, Christmas ham, or frankly most other kinds of ham. So, he's going home with a vaccum-sealed package of pre-cooked cubed ham. Congrats, Harry.
Sorry that was so bad. But thanks for joining in. As I've been saying a lot recently: you guys made that way more fun that it had any right to be. Enjoy your weekends, all.
Leaning toward "no metaphorical ham will be awarded today".
Can you tweak the quality/cost of the ham to make it an ironic award? (Or at least more ironic than it already is)
Can of Spam?
Completely agree with this: https://twitter.com/reverse_ball/status/1337824033526562816
That first-half felt exactly like what every Liverpol/Chelsea/United/Arsenal game felt like from 2005 to 2010. Cagey, fullbacks not involved high up the field, and the only chances come from set pieces or pretty fast, vertical combinations.
Reverse ball is low key one my favorite anonymous football Twitter accounts.
i feel that era was more rutting stags banging their heads together. these two at the moment are more (insert smaller antlerless mammal of your choice)
well at least we were miserably bored together
very bills-browns thursday night football circa 2012 energy here
Two holding midfielders minimum, one half of an attacking fullback maximum. This is what soccer was like before 2016.
it does seem like pep read your article on what makes teams successful and then decided to do opposite as mental exercise
Union Berlin are up, 1-0, on Bayern with 40 minutes to play. I would not blame you if you switched over to that match.
or replay dortmund - stuttgart to confirm that yes, yes it was that nightmarish....
Turns out Emre Can in a back 3 is not a sound defensive strategy.
HT Stat Update:
Shots (on target): United 7 (1), City 4 (1)
xG (per Stats Perform): United 0.42, City 0.85
Attacking-third passes: United 21, City 30
Penalty-area passes: United 3, City 6
does wan bissaka hitting a cross to no one count as an attacking 3rd pass? or does it have to be completed?
lol, it has to be completed
Rough 10 days for Fred.
If he is going to have to go off for an injury he might as well sneak in another yellow card before he does
give him the spray!
bathe him in the spray
What changes do we think Pep makes out of half? (Assuming that he didn't just wrestle with the epistemological conundrums of "Man Marking" the entire time)
They have absolutely no width, so: Gundogan for Mahrez or Sterling would be the Pep-iest way of doubling-down.
My Unscientific Unprovable Theory: Vincent Kompany was the best captain in soccer history
How else to explain this Man City-lite we've been seeing the last 2 years?!
thank you for not placing the chat curse on the everton-chelsea match
just here for jamie carragher troll picture now
This game makes me miss Simeone's Atletico Madrid
Every day we stray further from Bielsa's light
Despite what the announcers, City are not, in fact, man-marking Bruno Fernandes.
*announcers are saying
How soon do you think they’ll advocate taking potshots from outside the box?
o/u 35-minute mark
United still kind of feel more like a FIFA team than a real squad.
I like it. Good overall ratings, but the pieces don't fit.
And who amongst us hasn't bungled our way out of the Champions League by trying to squeeze two middling left backs onto the field at the same time
Toss a bunch of fast guys up top and just keep trying through balls!
Without fans do we think the players know how truly terrible of a spectacle this is
Crazy how much a difference it made in that Leeds Chelsea game this feels so empty
Not a good week for corner flags.
Anyone see Reyna’s goal earlier? Class
kinda sucks i cant irrationally hate on players who wear gloves now, but it was nice
For sure. Reyna the first name on the team sheet of the all-gloved XI
That egg Dortmund laid tho...
I thought Stuttgart were pretty good, but...word. Dortmund look a bit rudderless without Haaland
They’re lost without him. And Stuttgart were really good.
Like how graham just proposed that Wan-Bissaka learn how to cross from Fernandes. “Talk to a teammate who is better than you.” Innovative
If AWB and Bruno just talked to each other more, they'd be the two best players in the world.
Stack cliches by then adding--"the great players find it so hard to teach their skills"
Graeme the Galaxy Brain
Mahrez is Algerian Robben
SHAVE THE HEAD, MAHREZ
Only has one move cutting left, great against bad teams and hardly shows up in big games
whoa whoa whoa. i was unaware that either of them, especially robben, had this kind of reuptation!
I mean, they're both absolutely world class but at the same time so frustrating
Robben was Man of the Match in a Champions League final!
https://youtu.be/8Zl6znfigTM
If anyone feels a need for entertainment after that, try to hunt down a clip of Pavard giving the world's least necessary bicycle kick a go at the end of Bayern v. Union
What happened to Alex Telles? Has he still not recovered from COVID?
More pressing question is what happened to Daniel James
Plug, Telles, James, and Lingard into this team and they're title favorites.
Don't forget Axel "Mbappe Stopper" Tuanzebe.
Kyle walker strikes again
Pogba seems up for it today. He’s winning 50/50s in midfield AND doing the other sexy stuff too.
Hey Ryan what about a Madird Derby chat? Can't be more boring than this, right?
I feel like Chelsea/Everton SHOULD be more entertaining? but i've watched two EPL matches this morning and seen 1 late pk goal (The Bundesliga in between was way more fun) But the derby could be the right move
I just heard the commentator mention how the United away record is much better than home record. Does it even matter in this post apocalyptic football world? What's the difference between in a home and an away game? The difference in font size on those giant cards?
Seems like Dilva left quite a creative void in City's attack. Foden feels like the ideal replacement, but he's in Pep's doghouse.
Idk if it's creativity so much as control? Which is one reason I think he's gone double pivot more often recently.
KDB crushing the ball directly into the girthy middle of the United wall on that free kick is the only recap this game needs
anyone else notice klopp saying that chelsea should be viewed as title favorites? ember beef is still beef.
Ian Darke on Twitter suggesting that fatigue is the "only explanation" for why the Manchester Derby is so blegh.
LOL
https://twitter.com/IanDarke/status/1337836222123810816
Is Bruno Fernandes as good as the announcers say he is?
He's really good, though I think he's more of a floor-raiser than a ceiling-raiser. Give him the keys and he'll turn you into a pretty good team, but don't totally see him plugging into an elite team and making them better. But, uh, the announcers suggested earlier that he could make his teammates better by just talking to them.
everyone knows good players are better on good teams as a result of the dialogue
Doubt their genius at your own peril
Can you guess who equalized for Bayern?
Must be either Choupo-Moting or Goretzka.
A sane goal would make this city game even more frustrating so I would bet that's coming
Klose or Luca Toni?!
zirkzee or Davies the only acceptable answers
I feel dumber for having watched this
Remember when the premier league ball was juiced
I’m about to go run some errands. Watch there be goals now.
all of us are still watching so prob not
Feels like De Bruyne is super active in midfield winning the ball back. Is that normal for him and I just haven't watched closely enough?
Might have something to do with most United's midfield not being especially secure on the ball, too.
i feel like de bruyne has been working over time for weeks now
Definitely more common in the stretches without ilkay. him not on the field maybe the reason since rodri is so deep and ferna doesn't close like he used to
Yeah that makes sense. Man has to be tired doing all of that + set pieces and through balls to nobody...
This is a bit boring
was really looking forward to the VAR discussion...too bad
on tv or in here? nothing's stopping you from starting it in here
ill wait til the john stones VAR handball / bruno pk winner in the 85th min to start it here
Easy - var is good when it helps the team I root for, bad when it's used against us
ooooooh coming back?
100p
yup
roy keane be nice!!...
I'm just a United 1-0 win away from tweeting at how good Solskjaer is at coming up with reactive tactical plans for big games
Grace beat you to it: https://twitter.com/GraceOnFootball/status/1337816001342222341
it's kinda amazing how Fred just starts now and it's normal. Fred starting used to mean that the Rapture was imminent or at the very least the rest of the midfield were involved in an accident. Now OGS keeps him on even if the referee is minutes away from sending him off because Fred.
Fred is omnipotent. Fred is eternal.
Fred dressed up as Thanos for Halloween and now has legitimate reason to proclaim “I am inevitable” before every match when he sees the team sheet