Game kicks off at 1230 pm EST. I’ll be here right around then, but feel free to discuss El Clasico, the continued existence of Juan Mata, Manchester City’s devolution into Brendan Rodgers’s Swansea City, and etc. before then. See you soon!
I normally do a halftime stat update, but when I went to look up the numbers, my eyes went black and the garbage-monster from the beginning of Mulholland Drive appeared. You guys know what happened without the data.
For the second week in a row, I'm really sorry that we all had to watch that. United were slightly better, I guess, but "better" really doesn't feel like it has any right to be used in any discussion of this match. Neither of these teams seem like they're close to even performing at an average level for their team-wide talent, let alone exceeding it. Mendy looked good, which is both a positive development and a complete indictment of Chelsea's performance. Let us never speak of this match again. Go stare at cardboard or spread mayonnaise on some Wonderbread to get your heart rate back up to a living level. Enjoy the rest of the weekend, all. Thanks as always for hopping in and chatting.
Chelsea go out and buy every good young attacker in the world, so ... Frank Lampard opts for a system that requires five defenders. Interesting, interesting.
The team with five defenders is also the team that's dominating the ball. Not an ideal mix for anyone who doesn't want to fall asleep until AFTER the match.
To the point Arlo White just made on the broadcast: It's, uh, not quite true. Chelsea have only allowed the eight-fewest shots so far this season, and they're only 12th in expected goals against.
if you're playing a wingback system and confident you're going to have a lot of possession in the opponent half, are we sure that inverted wingbacks are a terrible idea? just thinking of spicy ideas out of boredom
Why have VAR if you're not going to give a penalty to Maguire for choking-out Azpilicueta in the box?
I normally do a halftime stat update, but when I went to look up the numbers, my eyes went black and the garbage-monster from the beginning of Mulholland Drive appeared. You guys know what happened without the data.
I wish I could hear what Thiago Silva and Cavani are talking about right now.
"Credit to Manchester United for still believing," he says, in a 0-0 game between two teams who are currently in the Champions League.
For the second week in a row, I'm really sorry that we all had to watch that. United were slightly better, I guess, but "better" really doesn't feel like it has any right to be used in any discussion of this match. Neither of these teams seem like they're close to even performing at an average level for their team-wide talent, let alone exceeding it. Mendy looked good, which is both a positive development and a complete indictment of Chelsea's performance. Let us never speak of this match again. Go stare at cardboard or spread mayonnaise on some Wonderbread to get your heart rate back up to a living level. Enjoy the rest of the weekend, all. Thanks as always for hopping in and chatting.
Prediction: United start to perform better with a world-class goalscorer and midfielder now on the field.
Chelsea go out and buy every good young attacker in the world, so ... Frank Lampard opts for a system that requires five defenders. Interesting, interesting.
"Cavani's taken the bib off. This is a big moment."
The team with five defenders is also the team that's dominating the ball. Not an ideal mix for anyone who doesn't want to fall asleep until AFTER the match.
Here is an impossible question to answer: 70 minutes in, who is your Man of the Match?
OK, fine. One stat: Timo Werner has completed five passes, which makes him look like Neymar compared to Marcus Rashford's three. This is why we watch.
Here's hoping chaos reigns
Dest and Fati definitely look like the future for Barça. Pique and Busi are cooked.
wouldn't be shocked if this game by itself regressed the average scoring output of the league back to the mean
Here comes Mason Greenwood and his howitzer cannon leg....**Activates defy xG function**
Mendy with the best moment of the match so far
looking like a repeat of the sevilla game so far
This game has 3-3 written all over it
Wish list: Cavani goal with Pogba assist
To the point Arlo White just made on the broadcast: It's, uh, not quite true. Chelsea have only allowed the eight-fewest shots so far this season, and they're only 12th in expected goals against.
Cavani to come on and miss a sitter for ***narrative***
Chaos in fact, did not reign
I think Mendy is allowed to have a howler after that save....hell of a reaction
If crosses are analogous to post-ups in basketball, is Reece James the Jahlil Okafor of the EPL?
if you're playing a wingback system and confident you're going to have a lot of possession in the opponent half, are we sure that inverted wingbacks are a terrible idea? just thinking of spicy ideas out of boredom
This game is less exciting than waiting for the green light on my waffle iron
As expected, this made Arsenal look good.
Man Utd (0.07) 0-0 (0.03) Chelsea
Is this the worst xG tally in recorded history?
What's the funniest way this game ends?
How much better would these teams be with different managers?
Tuned in 10 minutes ago and thus far I cannot be happier with the decision I made to watch Inter instead of this
Question for those who have played at a high level: how much tougher is it playing in these super wet conditions? Apologies for the noob content.
Pulisic starting to get some things going
What was the story with City this morning? Couldn't watch the match, but saw less than one xG apiece. KdB hurt? Why didn't he start?
Are Chelsea really trying to defend in a low block?